Memories ruined by OCD

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Memories are a part of us. They are a combination of our experiences and life lessons gathered over the years.

So what happens when OCD ruins these memories and tells us we can’t look back fondly?

I took a gap year after university. I was a very anxious student, struggling with mental health issues.

I made some changes in my life, and felt that travel would help me spread my wings and become more independent.

It did, and was one of the most amazing years of my life.

But since then, OCD has found ways to tarnish these memories that I cherish so much.

I went with friends, and OCD has convinced me that one of my friends was secretly seeing my girlfriend at the time. 

I hate the thought. And although I no longer care even if it was to have happened, I feel these memories are polluted in some way.

My brain tells me I shouldn’t be happy with these memories because at the time I was being lied to. The place and people weren’t kind to me. Everything and everyone was against me but pretending they weren’t.

It’s really traumatic because what was once the trip of my dreams is now something I wish to forget because of OCD.

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