Home intruder anxiety

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Home intrusion is a very common worry. OCD can take that worry to the next level, resulting in many horrible intrusive thoughts and compulsions.

This anonymous account describes how such a fear can take control, and affect sleep.

Although I have never suffered a break-in, my house was regularly attacked when I was young. I was bullied as a kid and teenagers would often bang on our doors and windows.

It was an awful experience. My hometown was pretty rough and home-intrusions were definitely a thing. There were two murders here when I was at school, one involved a break in. This probably had an impact on my OCD. 

During the day, this isn’t so bad. 

I don’t feel as alone and vulnerable, even if I am in the house alone. It is when I go to bed, I have these horrible thoughts about someone attacking me in my sleep. Graphic ones.

I put some step ladders in front of the door. I keep the living room light on. I shut the blinds and constantly go back to check if I have locked everything.

I then check under my bed, in my cupboards, in the attic… just to make sure someone isn’t hiding there.

Sometimes I wake up with anxiety, and constantly mistake noises and shadows for intruders. 

It feels like my brain is constantly on high alert and I can only really rest if I have friends or family in the house with me.

My anxiety always shoots up after switching the lights off at night. This makes sleeping very hard.

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